I have not written a blog post in a few weeks and I’ve missed it! I have had a very hectic couple of weeks and after my last finals I had two weeks off from school. It was definitely a much needed break because I was just studying non stop. I went to Vegas again for my husband’s birthday, and this time we went to see some more scenery and headed up to Red Rock Mountains. It was beautiful there and we took a very short hike. If I had the right shoes on I would have liked to go further, even in the high heat of the desert! In the second photo you will see we saw some weird spiral rock formation.
So, I wanted to come on and admit my failures and the fact that I am a hypocrite. I know the last couple of posts have been very positive and my last post was about being committed wherever you are. But, being on vacation and then coming back to a lot of stress made me fall off track for a week. I don’t deal well with stress and that paired with my anxiety disorder is why I developed an addiction to food in the first place. I just wanted to come on and be real and admit that the journey to a goal is not always perfect. I’m not perfect and I have my weaknesses that can rear their ugly head now and then. I have never been someone who eats when they’re depressed. In fact that is the time I don’t eat anything! But when I am really stressed I have difficulty coping with it well and it is something I continue to work on.
I have been stressed because I am now in my last semester before I graduate with my AA degree with a 4.0 GPA. I have really worked my butt off in school and it has been my priority. But lately I have really been stressing about what major to pick and I am torn between how viable it is to follow your passion, and whether I should choose stability and security instead. I could very well have both but it is stressful! In our current time when technology is changing rapidly, the work market isn’t the same. Having a degree is now just 50% of what you need, when it used to be ALL you needed. But I’m not going to go into that in this post.
Other than that our lease on our apartment was ending so we were looking for a new place to live, and home hunting is almost as trying as job hunting! Long story short we decided to stay where we are because we like it, it was just expensive. So now there is the stress of having to work harder to pay crazy So-Cal rent prices. The fact is though that for me when things are really stressful and more so undecided and unknown, that is usually when I lose control. It’s hard to stay on track when you don’t know what life will be in a month from now, or two months from now. I didn’t know where I was going to live, whether I should move back to Australia, which school to study my BA in, nothing. That really affects a goal achieving process. In order to be successful, you really need to lay a strong foundation down and have a plan. Being wishy-washy and indecisive gets you nowhere. This was just a very strange week too because my lovely grandmother-in-law passed away and I wished that I had gotten to know her better and driven down to San Diego to see her more. My dad also finally sold his business that he owned for 20 years!
During these times when life gets crazy and you don’t have control over things, you have to let go and let things work out. One of my favourite quotes:
I think it is during these times, and afterwards that we can really see what we truly want. After this past week of eating poorly I really saw just how much I hate the way I used to eat. It has only been one week and I already feel drained and just plain disgusting. It’s only been a week and I already don’t feel as confident about the way I look as when I was on track. It really shows how important eating well is both physically and mentally. And the danger is that the longer you let it go on, the harder it gets to get back on track. It doesn’t help to beat yourself up over it, just get back on track as soon as possible. Now that I am back in school I am getting right back on track and I am even going to try cutting meat out of my diet. I would like to become Pescetarian for both health and environmentally conscious reasons.
I have also been researching the whole idea of following your passion as a viable career choice. I think after the “The Secret” came out everyone was almost misguided and disillusioned by the message of that film. I definitely believe in the law of attraction but I really wanted to look into what it really means and what it takes to truly live a life beyond obligations and necessity. I mean how many people do you know that are living or pursuing their passion? Even when I look at people who are doing well, or at least decent they are not living their passion.
So I’d like your input on this:
Is it better to pursue your passion, even if you risk failure and struggling financially? Or, is it better to pursue a career that isn’t necessarily your passion but that you have some interest in and could tolerate doing as work?